Ruby Annas
Lately, I’ve been wondering if we have control of our own destinies – of where we go in life.
I think that where we are in life is partly because of where others began.
I know this is a philosophical start, but stay with me as I explain how a Graham County-born man brought me to where I am.
When I started my position as staff writer at The Graham Star, my nana Kathy Wilcox told me that my great-grandfather was born in Graham County. I never knew that.
His name was Paul Franklin Murphy, but everyone in my family calls him Paw Paw Murphy. He was born in the Panther Creek area on Feb. 26, 1934. However, if you asked him, he would pronounce it like “Painter Creek.”
He grew up and lived in Franklin with his parents, Merritt and Belle Murphy; along with 12 siblings.
When he was a teenager around 1954 or 1955, Paw Paw Murphy moved to Lenoir in Caldwell County with his family for a job. He successfully found employment at American Efird Mill and not soon after, found his wife, Ruby Elizabeth Chandler: my namesake. My family calls her Granny Ruby.
My Paw Paw Murphy lived with his friend in Lenoir and they would drive together to work. One day, they were driving back from work and stopped by a house in Lenoir. It was my Granny Ruby’s house. It was an old-fashioned house that she lived in with her family and it didn’t have any running water or heat.
Paw Paw talked to her on the porch. Murphy looked up at her in the rocking chair as they talked, sitting on the porch floor. At one point, Ruby squashed his fingers with the chair. She was worried he wouldn’t come back, but he did.
Granny Ruby and Paw Paw Murphy married on Feb. 18, 1956. They had six children – including my nana, who tells me a lot about my family history.
Paw Paw stayed in Caldwell County where he helped raise his family, continued working at the cotton mill and grew old.
I have a few fond memories of him, like how every time my siblings and I came over to their house, he always gave us candy and toys. He was also a very musical person, who played the guitar and harmonica. Paw Paw Murphy would play music with his siblings and parents – who could also play instruments and sing – on Saturdays at local establishments in Franklin and then in Caldwell County.
According to my nana, that’s how he saved up to buy his mother a refrigerator. No matter what, he always had his family in mind.
He was an amazing gardener who learned what he knew from his family and passed it on to all of us. His grandmother from Graham County had a phrase she would say when planting that my nana still recalls: “I’m going to plant ya. If you come up, I’m going to hoe ya. Then when you grow, I’m going to pick you and cook ya. If you don’t grow, I won’t do a damn thing!”
Humor is a very important aspect for my family, especially growing up without a lot of money.
Paw Paw Murphy also loved spending time with his kids and grandkids. My Nana described how her daughters would play with Paw Paw’s hair, combing it over his face and what not. He would just sit and enjoy their presence.
My Paw Paw passed away on Sept. 15, 2014 with Alzheimer’s Disease, three months after Granny Ruby. I was 13 years old.
I remember seeing him in the casket. He didn’t look like himself, but my family made sure there were parts of his character that went with him. One item was a comb in his breast pocket, like he always had to slick his hair back.
My nana also told me that Paw Paw Murphy loved reading the newspaper. He would read every word, front and back.
“He would have been tickled to know that you write for the newspaper,” Nana said to me.
Paw Paw helped start all my family that was born in Caldwell County: four generations worth. This wouldn’t have happened if a mountain man didn’t decide to go looking for a job.
And somehow I started working where he was born, without even being aware of that.
My siblings and I also graduated from Western Carolina University, close to where he lived in Franklin.
“Things are meant to happen,” Nana said. “It’s just a complete circle.” Ruby Annas is the staff writer for The Graham Star. She can be reached by phone, 828-479-3383; or email, rannas@grahamstar.com.